John Askew

God's Kitchen October 09 - John Askew Interview

1. Hey John, how's things?

Good thanks. And you?

2. First off, this will be the 2nd time you have played for us at Air only this time it will be in the slightly smaller confines of the Nitrogen room, does this mean we may see a darker side to John Askew or will it be the usual mixture?

I think there will be a mixture of stuff from melodic to hard as nails but it all depends on the crowd in the room - their mood, energy and vibe will determine what stuff I play - so I have my fingers crossed that they want me to give each and every one of them a sound thrashing.

3. Your monthly blog has become a bit legendary with clubbers for it's ‘warts and all' take on your lifestyle, what I want to know is, how many people have you upset along the way haha!

Only a few luckily - which is inevitable I guess. It's a bit different I know but still - some people just don't get it at all. I can't speak for anyone else so maybe I'm on my own here but personally all the djs blogs I get sent are all identical, unoriginal and tediously dull (“this week I went through the millions of promos I got sent because I'm so popular and then I finished off my fifteenth remix of the week before preparing myself for the 9 gigs I have this weekend by standing in front of the mirror admiring how big my cock is” - yawn - heard it all before - tell us something interesting you lifeless lump of vomit). There are exceptions like Tiga. His rants are exceptional and absolutely spot on.

4. Now, for fear of getting a mention in said blog for all the wrong reasons I thought I'd avoid all of the usual boring questions and try and make this as interesting as possible so first of all, what is the funniest thing you have seen this week?

Avid Merian's “Charmone Mo Fo” tribute to Michael Jackson on catch up TV last night. While the rest of the world blubbers about his death good old England comes up trumps with a full on piss take. Makes me feel so proud and patriotic. I love the bit where Craig David is in the call centre talking about his favourite Jackson track - the line where he says “It was a song about Bananos, No it wasn't - I don't even like Banaaaanos”. The way he said that line had me crying. I feel sorry for ‘UK Garage Sensation' Craig David. His career has been ruined by this Avid's portrayal and that's tragic but by Christ it's funny. I think he's doing ok in the US though so good for him.

5. Having interviewed both Sean Tyas and Simon Patterson in recent times it seems that you're a bit of legend when on tour however they were both very tight lipped about some of your escapades shall we say. Care to share a particularly interesting story with us from on tour?

I deny all accusations. Tyas and Patterson are the legends here - not me. Their stamina is subhuman and often terrifying. When you're on the same bill you know you're going to need a few weeks at the Betty Ford clinic. Keep them away from me please.

6. What's the best practical joke you've ever played on someone?

Clingfilm on the toilet seat is always a winner but the only issue is you need to be in the toilet to get the proper expression on their face and saying “do you mind if I come in there with you” can be taken in a number of wrong ways. The stripping of a mate on his stag do and leaving him tied to a park bench in the Devon countryside was a contender or this year on April fools we convinced a mate of mine who is a drummer that we'd got him a support slot drumming for a band on a major international tour. It was a bit mean but bloody funny.

7. What's the coolest thing you've ever bought yourself?

A beautiful 1980's black Gibson Les Paul Standard. But I sold it to buy my first set of decks!

8. A friend of mine recently went for an interview and the last question they asked was ‘if you were an animal what would you be?' which threw him somewhat as you can imagine but apparently you can tell a lot about a person from their answer (I use the term ‘apparently' very loosely here) so... if you were an animal which would you be?

Male Lions sit around in the sun all day doing fuck all while the females do all the hunting - and yet they are still the dons and as a result get first pickings on the grub and as much sex as they want. It's a close call but I think it would have to be a Great White Shark. It doesn't really get much cooler than that does it? So graceful as they glide through the water and yet they are essentially death machines that will eat anything. I'd love to get my own back on a group of Cornish Surfers who were so bloody territorial and hostile to non locals. Try giving me a dirty look now mate - as I wink at you while munching on your legs and lower torso!

9. Who's going to win the World Cup next year? Do England really have a chance or are we being deluded as usual?

We're always deluded but until that delusion is realised then of course England are going to win and shame on you for even hinting otherwise.

10. Which 3 famous people would you put into Room 101 if you could?

Is Room 101 a good or a bad thing? If it's somewhere to put people you don't like then it would have to be Sarah Cox, Derren Brown (I've had enough of your nonsense mate) and the bastard who “collects” our bins every other Monday and leaves more mess on my drive than was in my bin in the first place.

11. OK, you're on death row, you get to eat one meal, drink one drink, listen to one song, sleep with one woman and watch one film before you die, what would you pick?

Dinner - Christmas dinner with all the trimmings + cheese cake for pudding.
Drink - Rutini Malbec 2006
Song - Guns n Roses "Coma"
Fuck - The missus obviously (good boy Askew - play it safe son) or if I was single then Sylvia Saint (there may be trouble ahead.....).
Film - Godfather trilogy.

12. Finally, you can plug anything you like in 50 words...

New double CD mix album out with Digital Society on November 2nd
New single “Bad Apple” out November 23rd on Discover.
My remix of PvD “The Other Side” coming out soon in the UK on Positiva.
My remix of John O'Callaghan's “Don't Look Back” out later this month on Armada.

Cheers John!
My Pleasure